Author: Lynn

To this list, I would add no “blues” about being single!

The “bad blues” are a stealer and a thief of joy.  Though, like horses, they are sometimes difficult to keep at bay and they may sneak up on us like a Prius that didn’t see us… HAHAHAHA, sorry, bad rhyme…

Life is an interesting pendulum…

One of the greatest benefits and potential disappointments of singledom, is being unattached. That is not to say we don’t have great relationships, friendships or other ties in life, rather, we are as they say “footloose and fancy free”. We can travel at the drop of a hat, quit a job and pick up another without the common worries of having to provide beyond our own means. At current, I am in such a state of flux. I do not have a full time job anymore, which in many ways limits how far I can spread my wings, but it then provides other opportunities as well.

Today for instance, I went on a “wild goose chase” of an interview – I will spare you the details, but the upshot was when I walked into the recruiting office, I knew something was amiss and it was not the place for me. I walked back out without a word and proceeded to have the most GLORIOUS morning! I drove from Allendale, which is in the middle of nowhere – actually, it’s about half way between the Great Lake Michigan and the “big city” of Grand Rapids.  Since it’s of little relevance unless you’re a student at GVSU, I am going to bid it adieu, and proceed with my original tale for you.

Along my winding trail is where this tale of singledom was borne out. First, I was simply going to take the road, that if taken to it’s logical end, would lead to the Grand River; and head back west again on another winding road to Grand Haven proper. Once there, I was planning on a “boring” day of finding breakfast and probably walking the shores of Lake Michigan, taking a picture or two of the lighthouse etc.

Instead, I continued north, to the end and turned left. There, I was greeted by the most beautiful, still, serene, Great Blue Heron blending majestically against the swamp scum, reeds and branches. (I “shot” him with my iphone SE). From there, I wandered a bit more past a home I once considered haven of interesting treasures and its sand pile that once served for endless hours of entertainment. Sadly, it has long succumbed to the force of wind and weeds.  Now, the once haven has become a clutter castle, it’s once fine maiden, now a lonely spinster and spinner of tales. A little further up the road, the serenity continued in a marina bedding down for the winter.

My day continued in a wonderful fashion of finding interesting scenes along the way. A bright blue bicycle tied to a pole, behind a tenement, along a railroad

track, a cafe worth writing home about, time and peace in a library, time to enjoy all that life has to bring. Time, as my 7th grade geography teacher once told me, “to smell the roses”.

I just noted, how “blue” a day this was, not blue in the boo hoo sort of way, rather, blue as in beautiful blue bird, blue sky, blue bicycle. Too bad the only blue roses are those of the artificial variety.  Alas, what is one to do? I suppose artificial blue roses are like the moments of life when the sugar melts and you’re left with a mess… Until the next mess, I am off to roam, wander and see what color I can expound upon next! In the interim, be swell, y’all…don’t let the sugar melt without good reason and don’t get caught up in the treasonous thoughts of I am less because of my singleness… (Preachin’ to the choir here!)

DISCLAIMER! I am not sure this post will have much to do with the general topic of “Singledom” yet, it’s still a day we all have the choice to either, enjoy, endure, or otherwise survive! (Or perhaps even a combination of all the above?)

I also don’t know if it will have more parts than this or not – but you have been warned!

It’s true, I am not a fan of Halloween, yet, I find it appropriate (in a way) that it kicks off the “Holiday Season” as we now call it.  I think it’s good we get used to the idea of being scared as we enter the weeks before Thanksgiving.  Truly, we all have “those” relatives who we would prefer to stay relatively far away from…We all have an “Aunt Batty” who has a few bats in her belfry.  Then we have the endless varieties of cranberry sauce, jello, relish or salad, how do you which one you have? Some of which can be quite tart in their presentation.

Alas, I am trying to be a little tart in my presentation above, as I ran across something today as I was trying to decide what on earth to do with an old journal. The one in question had about 35 of the 180 +/- pages written on and one of the earlier entries was based on two people embroiled in complaining about food. Ironically enough, the food in question was that from a Thanksgiving dinner presented by a local church.

The journal entry was never finished, but I think it holds some truth and “interesting” points…without further ado, here is the entry entitled,  “The longest two miles” (November 2009)

“Recently, I attended a dinner at a local church. Mind you, those who ran the dinner had no culinary background & had a limited budget to boot.

The trouble with living in the land of plenty, is that it leaves plenty of room for complaint. We are very spoiled here, I can go to the cupboard & choose from 16 varieties of cereal; never mind that I don’t like 1/2 of them.

It’s quite possible all 16 varieties have been opened and sampled and are now ever closer to their expiration date. Which brings me to my next point, the church dinner, while not the greatest, definitely had the main ingredient – Love.

Those who comprised the complaints during the longest two miles were those closest to their natural expiration dates.”

Thankfully, the complainants have not reached their “natural expiration dates” and looking back, I am not sure what that sentence really had to do with anything I had written previously. Other than perhaps, that they should have known better than to complain about a “free meal”, one they did not have to prepare…I know my motivation for having them attend the dinner was more than just a night out.  It was their focus afterwards which saddened me; I was hoping they would have picked up on more than the mashed potatoes were packaged and thus not “real”.

I think, my motivation for writing that was how “un-thankful” we can be, especially around a day we have specifically set aside for that purpose, in addition to where is our focus? Is it only on what we can see in front of us? Is it on some future event or days of yore? I was hoping they would set their focus off from the food and onto the call of Christ that night, as there is more to this life than analyzing potatoes.

I cannot force, cajole, or otherwise persuade others to receive Christ, or to be thankful, grateful, or otherwise happy, in our dower, materialistically consumed culture. But as a single, solitary person, I am going to make an effort of being “thankful” not only in the weeks to come leading up to Thanksgiving, but until my ‘natural expiration date’.

Perhaps I will keep a running list starting today with one thing I am thankful for and see if I can keep it up for 365 days – until November 4, 2018. I would like to challenge you, my “39 readers” to do the same, and let us make a date to come together on Sunday, November 4. 2018 and compare lists!

Until then, be well, be thankful and don’t expire. Rather INSPIRE others to be thankful!

Wow, where did this year go!?  I think I am ready to say goodbye to 2017, it’s definitely been a wonky year! I am not sure if I am looking forward to Thanksgiving or not…It used to be one of my favorite holidays as my siblings would come home, we would have the aunties and cousins over and it was a great time of family togetherness.

In more recent years though, it seems to becoming a polarizing holiday. Stores are opening on this once traditionally family day to entice us to get our Christmas shopping done before the crowds hit – Black Friday! Our family too, is very scattered and we don’t always make the effort to be together.

The other challenge I find with this day is if seems to be the gateway into the days celebrating coupledom. As an older single adult, this becomes an emotional time. I don’t have children or significant to buy gifts for and while some of my friends and I exchange gifts, it’s not an engrained tradition. I also find this time of year to be the tunnel of togetherness holidays culminating at the ultimate one “Valentines Day”.  To be frank, it’s a very emotional time of year. It seems during the “dark” days of winter, these togetherness days can really take their toll.

However, I would really rather they not take me out completely. I think I am going to try to make a point of calling on people who I know are in a similar boat, trying to add some love and cheer back into the community – rather than getting sucked into the vacuum of loneliness. With that, I am going to start today by making a phone call to someone who can at times, be a bit dower. Here is to being a light at the end of the tunnel!

Hello there! I absolutely love the Breathe Christian Writers Conference, it is a solace to my soul. It is a safe haven for the novice to the novelist in terms of a writing conference. Below is my submission that was very graciously accepted to be featured on their blog, I am BEYOND EXCITED!! To top it all off, I had a wonderful headshot done by a friend of mine, someone whose work and life I admire. She is also a wonderful photographer here in lovely Allegan Michigan. So, should you have a desire to have photos taken for any reason, I would highly recommend my friend Becky Martin! https://www.facebook.com/PhotosByBeckyMartin/

Alas, here is my submission to the “Breathe CWC!” http://breatheconference.com/home/

Breathe in, breathe out, you are my oxygen…writing; you are life giving to me.

The Breathe conference is almost otherworldly in its provision of sanctuary for the tender writers soul. It’s a time when we come together to share our inmost parts and learn how to present ourselves to the world beyond.

However, for me, something was amiss in the atmosphere this year; the theme “connect to create” was not resonating… You see, connection is a challenge for me; thus I have begun to explore the science of approachability. I have been reading on the topic of making friends and the challenges thereof. One would think at a safe haven such as Breathe, making friends would be as simple as – breathing…?

As I related my reading to my experience at Breathe this year, I could not help but wonder what it was that caused things to feel “amiss” in the atmosphere. Was it because I was too casual? I noted others were more a tad more formal to my wandering around in jeans and a hoodie. Was it as I first noticed, while walking to dinner, because I was wearing two amazingly similar, yet different shoes? (Same style, same fit, different colors!) OOPS!

However, all hope was not lost! Despite not making new outward connections, I did see many familiar faces and I was able to reconnect with the dear friend who first introduced me to the wonders of the Breathe Writers Conference. In spite of what may seem like a “down” time, I made perhaps, the most important connection of all. I truly connected with my inner writer, bringing her to the front, displaying for all the world to see, her hidden works, words and wisdom.

Till next time, keep on “breathing”!

Hello and thank you for coming back to the “Single Slice of Cheese” blog! I am glad you have decided to return! Tomorrow is the most interesting day of Halloween. Frankly, the allure of this day has worn off for me. When I was younger, I loved going door to door begging for candy by yelling “TRICK OR TREAT” and then adding under my breath “smell my feet, give me something good to eat!”

Much to my dismay, my mother did not subscribe to the idea of buying a cheap vinyl costume and mask to be worn one night during the last week of October. BOO to her is what I thought!

Later, in my teen years, I had MUCH fun filling up my “Super Soaker” squirt gun and knocking on a few choice doors and soaking the (teacher) person who opened their door to my demand for candy.  Oh what fun it was…

I know, I know, that really does not have much to do with being a single adult in 2017, however, it did in part help to create who I am today. I am not going to say that my mothers refusal to spend good money on a costume that would be of little relevance the next year scarred me for life and that I am now “blaming” her for all of my issues of life! Rather, I think it was that lack of a “big deal” over a night of indulgence that has helped to shape my current views on the day and a lot of other much bigger decisions in life.

Interestingly, as an adult, I have zero desire to “celebrate” the day of Halloween, I would much rather pay 1/2 price for all of my candy anyway! Alas, I know many people find this time of year a great time to have Halloween, harvest, or other assorted parties. Do we really need a reason to have a party?

I reckon on one hand singledom could be looked at as a non stop party for one as technically, we’re the only person we’re responsible for! Sorry single parents, that was not meant as a slight to y’all! Alas…

Fellow singles, have fun, be safe and be sure to inspect all your candy accepted from strangers!